How to Prepare for Your First Coaching Session

Know what a first session is for, so you prepare for the right thing

A first coaching session is mainly about foundations. You and your coach agree how you will work together, explore the context you lead in, and begin to shape the goals the coaching will serve. You are unlikely to solve your biggest challenge in the first hour, and that is fine.

Preparing for this purpose means bringing material, not conclusions. The typical flow of an executive coaching session is useful background if you have never been coached before.

Reflection prompts to work through in the week before

Answer these in writing, briefly, a few days before the session. You do not need to share every answer; the point is to have done the thinking.

• ✦What happened recently that made me decide to look for a coach now?
• ✦If coaching works, what will I be doing differently in six months that I am not doing today?
• ✦Who would notice the change first, and what would they see?
• ✦What do I tend to avoid, delay or overthink at work?
• ✦What feedback have I heard more than once, even if I disagreed with it?
• ✦What am I nervous about saying out loud in coaching?

Bring three real situations instead of a career summary

Your coach does not need your CV. They need to understand how you think and act in practice. Choose three recent situations: one that went well, one that went badly and one you are still unsure about. Note what happened, what you did and what you were thinking at the time.

Specific moments reveal patterns far faster than general descriptions. 'I went quiet when the CEO challenged my numbers' gives a coach much more to work with than 'I struggle with confidence'.

Sort out the practical details the day before

1. 01

   Protect the time on both sides

   Block 15 minutes before the session to settle and 15 minutes after to write notes. Do not schedule a high-stakes meeting straight afterwards.

2. 02

   Choose a private space

   For online sessions, use a room where you cannot be overheard, with headphones and your camera on. For in-person sessions, allow for traffic and parking.

3. 03

   Gather anything relevant

   If you have a recent 360 report, a performance review or a development plan, bring it. If your employer is sponsoring the coaching, bring the objectives you agreed with them.

4. 04

   Decide who needs to know

   You may want to tell your manager or assistant you are starting coaching, or keep it private. The page on whether to tell your manager you have a coach helps you weigh it up.

Questions worth asking your coach in the first session

Coaching is a partnership, so the first session is also your chance to set terms. These questions help you understand how the relationship will work before you rely on it.

• ✦What exactly stays confidential, and are there any limits?
• ✦What do you expect from me between sessions?
• ✦How will we review whether this is working, and when?
• ✦What should I do if a session does not feel useful?
• ✦Can I contact you between sessions if something urgent comes up?

Habits that make a first coaching session less useful

• ✦Presenting a performance. If you only share what makes you look capable, the coaching will work on the wrong problem.
• ✦Arriving straight from a crisis. Walking in still mentally inside the last meeting uses up half the session just to arrive.
• ✦Expecting answers. A good coach will mostly ask. If you wait for instructions, you will leave disappointed.
• ✦Over-preparing a script. Notes help; a rehearsed speech closes down the conversation.
• ✦Treating the goals as fixed. First-session goals usually sharpen over the next few meetings. Hold them loosely.

Example: a new head of department in a government entity

Imagine someone recently appointed to head a department in a government entity. Before their first coaching session, they write a two-page briefing on the department's strategy and their own career. At the last minute, they also jot down a moment from the previous week when a senior official dismissed their proposal and they said nothing.

In the session, the briefing barely comes up. The coach asks about the moment they stayed silent, and the conversation turns to how hierarchy and their wish to be respectful are shaping how they show up. That becomes the first coaching goal.

This scenario is hypothetical. It shows why one honest example is often worth more than pages of polished background.

After the session, capture what shifted within a day

The thinking a coaching session starts continues for hours afterwards. Within 24 hours, write down the question that stayed with you, anything you noticed about yourself, and one small action you will try before the next session.

If you are not sure what to bring to the following sessions, what to talk about in coaching gives you a starting list.

How I run a first session

In my one-to-one executive coaching, the first session follows a free 30-minute discovery call, so we already know a little about each other. We agree how we will work, explore your context and start shaping goals in your own words, in Arabic or English, in person in Manama or online. I will ask more than I tell, and what you share stays strictly confidential.